There are four main types of narcissism. Researchers have been searching for the core of narcissism that is shared by all narcissists despite varying symptoms and severity. Narcissists use a variety of tactics and defenses to keep you insecure and ensure your status and needs are met. It’s easy to get confused, but it’s important to understand and spot what kind of narcissist you’re dealing with. Recently, two research teams have
identified a common trait.
The Grand Narcissist
Although there are different degrees and types of narcissism, for years research has focused primarily on familial-exhibitionist narcissists seeking limelight. These are the boasters magnificent narcissists who are public figures and are recognizable in movies. They are described in the Diagnostic Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) as narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).
We can all spot those charming attention-seeking extroverts whose conceit and audacity are sometimes obnoxious and shameless. They are self-absorbed, authoritarian, callous, exploitative, authoritarian, and aggressive. Some are physically abusive. These arrogant and empathetic narcissists think highly of themselves, but they hold no grudge against others. Aided by their extraversion, they report high self-esteem and satisfaction with their lives, despite the pain they cause others. Because they outwardly seek acclaim, attention, and domination, grandiose narcissism comes out. Even in love, they seek power by playing. Many do maintain relationships, despite the lack of intimacy and the unhappiness of their partners, who are easily seduced by their charisma and daring.
The vulnerable narcissist
A lesser known type of narcissism is vulnerable narcissism (also known as covert, introverted, or covert narcissism). Like their grandiose relatives, vulnerable narcissists are selfish, bossy, exploitative, lacking in empathy, manipulative, and aggressive, but they fear criticism so much that they shy away from calling it attention. Individuals with both types of narcissism often lack autonomy, have impostor syndrome, a weak sense of self, are alienated, and unable to master their environment.
Unlike grandiose narcissists, instead of feeling confident and satisfied with themselves, vulnerable narcissists are insecure and unhappy with their lives. They experience more distress, anxiety, guilt, depression, hypersensitivity, and shame. They are conflicted, have inflated and negative irrational views of themselves, the latter being projected onto other people, their lives, and the future. His negative emotionality represents a bitter neurotic aversion to personal growth. They require reinforcement for their grandiose self-image and are very defensive when perceived criticism triggers a negative opinion of themselves.
Unlike extroverted narcissists, they lack positive relationships. Instead of boldly dominating people, they are threat oriented and distrustful. Their attachment style is more avoidant and anxious. They turn away from others with hostile guilt and resentment, internalizing their narcissism. Empathic codependents sympathize and want to put them out of their misery, but end up sacrificing themselves and feeling responsible for them.
The Communal Narcissist
Even more difficult to identify is a third type of narcissism. It was recently named communal narcissism. Community narcissists value warmth, kindness, and relatedness. They see themselves and want to be seen by others as the most trustworthy and supportive person and they try to achieve this through kindness and kindness.
They are extroverts like the grandiose narcissist. However, while the grandiose narcissist wants to be seen as the most intelligent and powerful, a communal narcissist wants to be seen as the most generous and helpful. The vain selflessness of community narcissists is no less selfish than that of a grandiose narcissist. Both share similar motives of grandeur, esteem, entitlement, and power, although each employs different behaviors to achieve them. When their hypocrisy is exposed, it is a major downfall.
The malignant narcissist
Malignant narcissists are considered to be at the extreme end of the narcissism type continuum due to their cruelty and aggressiveness. They are paranoid, immoral and sadistic. They find pleasure in creating chaos and bringing people down. These narcissists are not necessarily grandiose, extroverted, or neurotic, but they are closely related to psychopathy, the dark triad, and antisocial personality disorder. (Houlcroft, et al. (2012)
Fluctuating ego states between types of narcissism
If you’re having trouble identifying what type of narcissist you’re dealing with, it may be because grandiose narcissists oscillate between states of grandiosity and vulnerability. For example, grandiose narcissists may display vulnerability and emotionality (usually anger) when their success is thwarted or their self-concept is under attack. Greater grandiosity indicates greater instability and probability of fluctuation. There is little evidence that vulnerable narcissists display grandiosity. (Edershile & Wright, 2019), (Rhodewalt, et al. 1998)
The search for the core of narcissism
Using new techniques, recent studies have attempted to isolate a singular and unifying trait among narcissists. The researchers examined narcissism by testing different personality traits. Two recent models have emerged: one is based on personality and the other is an integrative and transactional approach.
The trifurcated model
The trifurcated model shows that narcissism centers on three personality traits: agentive extraversion, dislike, and neuroticism. (Miller, Lynam, et al., 1917) (Agency extroverts are ambitious, authoritative, and bold who pursue positions of acclaim, achievement, and leadership.)
Of the Big Five personality traits, dislike is the only one common to both types. The model illuminates the core of narcissism as an interpersonal antagonism, shared by grandiose and vulnerable narcissists alike. It is characterized by manipulation, hostility, entitlement, callousness, and anger. (Kaufman, et al., 2020) Vulnerable and grandiose narcissists express antagonism differently. The former are more hostile and distrustful, and the latter more immodest and domineering.
The spectrum model
The Narcissism Spectrum Model (NSM) created by Kerzan and Herlache (2017) conceives of narcissism as existing on a spectrum from the great to the vulnerable. It demonstrates how NPD varies in severity and how the traits manifest. The model reveals the spectrum model of narcissism
that both types of narcissists share a common psychological core of entitled self-importance. Narcissists believe that they and their needs are special and take precedence over those of others. This core is made up of arrogance, selfishness, and entitlement. In fact, entitlement is reported to be the most toxic element in relationships.
The different personalities of narcissists express various qualities at various times, this model captures a fluid and functional analysis that is more representative of real life. The greater the grandiosity of a person, the less their vulnerability and vice versa. More entitlement and risk-taking increase professional and interpersonal difficulties. The higher the vulnerability, the further (lower) its grandiosity.
takeaway
In short, narcissism exists on a spectrum from dominant and extroverted to introverted and neurotic. The central characteristics of narcissism are antagonism, self-importance, and entitlement, which make narcissists unpleasant, uncooperative partners, and co-workers. Because other personality types can be antagonistic, I prefer the spectrum model that highlights the right to self-importance as the core of narcissism, thus distinguishing it from sociopathy and borderline personality disorder, among others.
Grandiose narcissists present a mixed bag. While they feel and function better than vulnerable narcissists and can participate socially when they want, their antagonism and entitlement creates problems and jeopardizes relationships. If they attend psychotherapy, they should focus on their antagonism and entitlement.
On the other hand, vulnerable narcissists need help managing their perceptions, moods, and emotions. They resemble people with borderline personality disorder and would benefit from dialectical behavior therapy, which is effective in reducing antagonism. Schema-focused psychotherapy and cognitive behavioral therapy are helpful for both types to reduce shame and anger.
Whichever type of narcissist you care about, the relationship is hurtful. Instead of getting your needs met, you feel undermined and exhausted by dealing with frequent criticism, insensitivity, hostility, demands, and legitimate expectations. Don’t waste your efforts trying to please or change a narcissist. Instead, start recovery to rebuild your self-esteem and autonomy so that you are more resilient whether you stay or go. If you’re undecided, seek individual psychotherapy and use the tools in Dealing with a Narcissist to determine your relationship prognosis.
© Darlene Lancer 2020
Edershile, E. & Wright, E. (2019). “Fluctuations in Grandiose and Vulnerable Narcissistic States: A Momentary Perspective”. DOI: 10.31234/osf.io/8gkpm.
Houlcroft, L., Bore, M. & Munro, D. (2012). “Three Faces of Narcissism”. Personality and individual differences, 53:274-278.
Kaufman, S.B., Weiss, B., Miller J.D., and Campbell, W.K. (2020). “Clinical correlates of vulnerable and grandiose narcissism: a personality perspective”. personality Disorders Magazine, 34(1), 107-130.
Krizan, Z. & Herlache, A.D. (2018). “The Spectrum Model of Narcissism: A Synthetic View of the Narcissistic Personality”. Review of personality and social psychology, 1:29. DOI: 10:1177/1088868316685018.
Miller, JD, Lynam, DR, Hyatt, CS, & Campbell, WK (2017). Controversies in narcissism. Clinical Psychology Annual Review, 13, 291-315.
Rhodewalt, F. & Morf, CC (1998). On self-aggrandizement and anger: a temporal analysis of narcissism and affective reactions to success and failure. journal of personality and social psychology74(3), 672.
