During the height of my anxiety disorder, I dove right into my fears and if I had known about a gradual system called systematic desensitization back then, I definitely would have taken this less scary route. Systematic desensitization assumes that fears and phobias are learned and can also be unlearned through controlled exposure to the phobia, the process slowly de-sensitizing people to the feared object. The process begins by clearly acknowledging what your fear is and then making a ladder in the form of a hierarchy from the least scary to the ultimate goal with 10 action steps for each fear. In the case of claustrophobia and fear of elevators, your staircase might look like this:

1) Imagine an elevator in your mind

2) look at a silly drawing of someone in an elevator

3) look at a more serious real drawing of someone in an elevator

4) look at a real photo of another person in an elevator

5) find and look closely at a real elevator

6) take a step in an elevator and then take a step back

7) go up a floor with a friend with you in an elevator

8) go to the top floor with a friend in the elevator with you

9) Go up one floor on your own in an elevator

10) Finally, go up to the top floor by yourself in an elevator

As you can see, the individual starts with the step that causes only a small amount of very manageable anxiety, and from there is slowly exposed to more and more challenging scenarios. I have always been very fond of tattoos and have had a few over the years. One day, after a yoga session towards the end of my anxiety period, I read a quote on the wall that read: “All power comes from within and is therefore under our control.” I couldn’t think of a better quote to portray the struggles we go through every day. As a reminder, I decided to tattoo it on my forearm, but I have to admit that during that time I also got tattoos in order to fulfill a very real need that all humans need these days, the need to be meaningful in the world. As I carry the message every day,

Recently, I started to look back on my struggles and realized that, in the end, all the tools to change my past nightmares were actually inside of me all along. Once I tapped into that power with the boost I got from the tools I used in my new daily life, I was finally able to let go of my panic and generalized anxiety disorder. Of course I knew it wasn’t going to be a direct path to anxiety release, my mind and body put up a hell of a fight determined to suck me back into the old cycle of worry and fear of bodily sensations. Again, this quote that I have tattooed on my arm is another form of strength that I draw from if my past reappears in the future. Of course, I am not telling you to get a meaningful quote tattooed on your arm, but I am telling you to surround yourself with things that will keep you on the right track in times of need.