Emily Post (1873-1960) was the doyen of etiquette advisers and in 1922 she wrote advice on etiquette for christenings or christenings. Some of the advice is valid today, but changes in communication methods and modern lifestyles make some of the advice seem terribly outdated. I wonder what she says Mrs. Post would have thought about how we behave today?
Here are some of the tips he gave for baptisms more than 80 years ago:
“Christening invitations are never formal, because you’re only supposed to ask family and a very few close friends. On this day, invitations are almost all sent by phone, except to those far away, or to friends… ask verbally when they see each other, but it’s proper and courteous to write notes.”
This is the form of the invitation:
“Dear Mrs. (name):
The baby will be baptized here at home, next Sunday at half-past four, and we hope that you and Mr. (name) and the children, if you like, will come.
Affectionately,
(Your name)“
All very rigid and formal, but it seems that the telephone invitations would be communicated by a servant:
“Mr. and Mrs. Gilding, Jr. would like Mr. and Mrs. Norman to attend the baby’s christening on Sunday at half past four at their home.”
Whereas, today, it would all be terms of name, church attendance, and communication via email, mobile/cell phone.
On the subject of godparents, Emily Post writes:
“Before setting the date of the baptism, of course the godmothers (two for a girl and one for a boy) and the godparents (two for a boy and one for a girl) have already been chosen.
“Since godparents are always the closest of friends, it’s natural to ask them when they’re coming to see mom and baby (which they probably do often) or write if they’re a long way away.”
But I hadn’t realized that the invitation was supposed to be sent by the newborn:
“I arrived last night and my mother and father were very happy to see me, and now I am looking forward to seeing you.
your beloved godson,
(Name)”
There is much more besides. Tips on what to wear, the arrangement of rooms at home and when to return the baby to the nurse (!), before moving on to the important tips on gifts and christening gifts:
“The godparents should, of course, give the baby a gift, if not before then at least at the christening. The standard ‘gift’ is a silver cup, a porridge or a knife, fork and spoon, usually marked with the name of the baby. and that of the giver”. For example:
Adam Lee. From his godfather. stewart hersey
Of course, there is nothing to stop other guests, especially grandparents, at the christening from giving silver christening gifts.
