There seems to be an endless stream of dumb things professional athletes do. I guess if you get a group of young people together, give them a lot of money and a lot of free time, what can you expect? When beautiful women, the media, and the luxuries of life are thrown at them, their arrogance and stupidity are only amplified. Here are my top ten, but of course there are many more. However, we must always remember that they are also human.

1. Make me a good game!

Have you ever seen NFL players beat their chests like a gorilla after making a good play? I guess it’s a Tarzan thing or something, but they look kind of goofy. Maybe if he was on the field and he was a 170-pound kicker watching a defensive lineman hit his chest after a sack, he might be a little intimidated, but overall, they look really goofy doing it. (I attended a professional women’s soccer game this year and saw a 350-pound woman do this, which was particularly terrifying.)

2. The God Factor, Part I

I hate when players point to the sky and thank God after a good play too. However, please note that I am not criticizing religion or anyone for having faith in God. But this just looks like leaf. It happens a lot in MLB for some reason. A strikeout will have Pedro Martinez tapping his chest and pointing a double index finger at God as if he and God were talking earlier about possible pitching strategies in the locker room, and the strategy they chose together worked, for which he had to be personally thankful. to God using his direct line.

3.The God Factor, Part II

The locker rooms, the sidelines, the dugouts, the bullpens and the sidelines are often filled with praying men. One question: “If you are praying to win, and your opponent is praying to win, who does God choose?

4. Bad boys, bad boys, what will they do when they come for you?

Why are professional athletes arrested so much for possession of drugs and/or weapons? Of course a lot of people do this unfortunately we only hear about famous athletes doing it. Come on guys, keep the drugs at home, stop driving while high, and please stop packing! You don’t need a gun. Who is going to hurt you? You are six six years old and weigh 275 pounds!

5. It wasn’t me!

Telling Congress you don’t take steroids and then getting caught taking steroids is pretty dumb. I loved watching the clips where Rafael Palmero sat pointing his finger at the congressional audience and said with disgust and confidence, “I don’t take steroids.” And then the next clip that shows him profusely apologizing for taking steroids.

6. I love you to death

Fortunately, murdering ex-lovers doesn’t happen very often, but my list wouldn’t be complete without at least mentioning OJ.

7.Rabbits

There seem to be a lot of NBA players out there who use the phrase “my baby’s mommy” way too often. And there are too many children of professional athletes who introduce their friends as “My brother from another mother.” Have you ever heard of a condom?

8. How much Bling Bling do you need?

It’s fascinating to see professional athletes spend all their millions in their first year or two and then have nothing left when they retire, which is usually only a few years later. How many fifty-somethings still play professional sports? Not many (minus the golfers, of course, who will be dragging their poles and oxygen tanks with them on the fairway). So why don’t professional athletes save a couple of bucks?

9. I love my pig

It’s not too smart to get injured outside of work when you’re a professional athlete. Kellen Winslow Jr. of the Cleveland Browns crashed his motorcycle recently and will now miss the 2005 NFL season. Jay Williams, the No. 1 draft pick by the Chicago Bulls, also had a motorcycle accident and hasn’t played since. What about motorcycles anyway? Talk about killing the goose that lays the golden eggs.

10. “When you come to a fork in the road, take it” – Yogi Berra

Saying really dumb things in the media seems like a particularly easy thing to do if you’re a professional athlete. I searched many places online to come up with a good list here. My problem was that there were so many good ones that I wasn’t sure which one to choose. But here are some gems:

has. Paul Hamm, gymnast: “I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.”

b. Baseball player Tito Fuentes, after being hit by a pitch: “They shouldn’t throw me. I’m the father of five or six children.”

vs. Football Coach Ray Malavasi: “I don’t care what the tape says. I didn’t say it.”

d. Baseball player Dizzy Dean, after a 1-0 game: “The game was closer than the score indicated.”

me. Boxing analyst: “Sure there have been injuries, and even some deaths in boxing, but none of them really that serious.”

F. Football Commentator: “Julian Dicks is everywhere. It’s like they have eleven Dicks on the field.”

gram. Bill Cowher, Pittsburgh Steelers coach: “We’re not trying to circumcise the rules.”

H. Jim Wohford: “Ninety percent of the game is half mental.”

Yo. Joe Theismann: “No one in football should be called a genius. A genius is someone like Norman Einstein.”

d. Charles Shackleford of the NCSU basketball team: “Left hand, right hand, doesn’t matter. I’m amphibian.”

k. Shaquille O’Neal on his lack of championships: “I’ve won at every level except college and pro.”

As I asked before, what can we expect from professional athletes? They often reflect society as a whole. Too much time, money and fame at a very young age can increase stupidity, plain and simple. We all say and do silly things, but luckily, we don’t have microphones or video cameras pointed at us all the time. As Norman Einstein used to say, “Really smart athletes stay out of trouble because they can predict the future with their ESPN.”

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Copyright: 2005